Thursday, October 18, 2012

And Yea, As I Prepare To Gaze Into The Abyss

...I regret nothing.

I'm closing in on the point where I will fully have AssRev in the bag, completely and totally and were I in better health, tonight would be a review for it.  Or a review for Retro City Rampage.  Both of which I -want- to do, but I can't stay focused enough to even attempt.  I need to build up a verve, an energy to really put out something of that length that maintains quality I'm happy with, so I am more than willing to wait for when it'll be right than to attempt it and fail.  Which surprises me, because I would never describe myself as a patient man, but I suppose that sort of thing just comes naturally when you care about what you're doing.  Anyways, melodrama or whatever that is aside, with AssRev out of the way, I'll be heading off to new journeys to get through the backlog that I carelessly add games to at a whim because I am extremely short-sighted or something.  My options are various and tempting, though my eye has been warily trained at Final Fantasy XIII since its release, admittedly merely because of those that came before it, and the polarizing nature of its content has had me even more curious.

I've stated various times that I feel like I am too lenient on most games, most of the time (not all of them, of course, as you'll see with the few Ragequit posts I've made) so a lot of the time, I'll still find a way to speak positively about games that others have panned, probably rightly so.  Of course, there are times where I find that my opinion falls right in with the general consensus out there, and in those cases, it just cannot be helped - you like what you like and you can't really do a whole lot about that.  Still, when I see a game so polarizing, I can't help but want to try it -just- to see which side of the fence I land on - a simple curiosity to sate rather than hoping for an experience or preparing myself for a flop.  My standards are low that way, in that I'm not expecting -anything-, but also -everything-, simply for gathering purposes, that I may come up with an aggregate of my feelings, my own thoughts, of whatever the game is in question.  That's sort of my mindset with Final Fantasy XIII, or as best at it as I can.

I fear that I may already be a little painted in my opinion of FFXIII because of 'Hope Estheim' (Who, for some time, I thought his name was literally Hope Esteem which is disgustingly cheesy and inexcusable) who seems to fill 'that role' as that character you just say "ugh" to for the most of the game before he does a turn for awesome or something and I roll my eyes because I am not swayed so easily.  What I mean is that I already have a little negativity built for the game which is unfortunate and I should know better, but I have been trying to put it aside.  It may be a few days yet before I begin the game, depending on how kind AssRev's MP is to me (and how easily this infection surrenders from my body), so I may be able to 'cleanse' myself of these off thoughts of the game, ready and eager to put it through its paces in my own way

Given my history with Final Fantasy as a series, being that I have only dabbled, never really conquered aside from a handful of games, it's actually a bit of a mystery going in because maybe I just won't beat this one either.  Obviously, you go into any game expecting to beat it, but attention spans fade when it comes to RPGs, and I can already feel the tug of Deus Ex:  Human Revolution, but I think the thing that will inspire me forward is the prospect of playing FFXIII-2, which is apparently, by all accounts, fun.  I -seek- fun, I live for it in games, and I want to always find fun in the games I play.  I expect to find -some- within the confines of FFXIII, but I expect more from the sequel.  And that alone, I believe, will be enough to bring me through the entirety of XIII, if just to be able to experience XIII-2 and try to make sense of its story, which is probably a fool's errand.  Whatever the outcome, I'm sure I'll end up throwing it out here!

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